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Misunderstood Empire: Almost Certainly Your Fault
Welcome, Ambassador! We have long longed for this, and other things.
Here within our uncertain borders may you find much distraction. Whilst here, peruse with pleasure or disdain the evidence of our confusions. Misunderstood artisans, wearing socks of our own devising, hand carve each illustration from a select block of cheese, itself mined from the deepest regions of the empire.
Reluctant canoes stand in ready by the shore to bear you away at your behest.
But these were things.